Thursday, August 25, 2011

Hat 'n' Boots

Sometimes I sit back and count my lucky stars to be able to live in the same metropolitan area that houses the world's largest hat and cowboy boots. It's a cryin' shame that the majority of my friends and co-workers who have lived in western Washington their entire lives aren't even aware that such whoppers of western wardrobe have been one bus ride away for over 57 years.
Our little family moseyed on over to Oxbow Park in the Georgetown neighborhood of Seattle only a few months after we moved into town. This little trip was absolutely necessary to retain our status as fans of America's favorite comedy, National Lampoon's Vacation. Sara's mom had tipped us off that Hat 'n' Boots is featured in one of the slides during the opening sequence of the movie. Actually I'm not doing this particular slide any justice, it may be the single most important one that flashes by in the opening credits, as it is the one that has "And Introducing Christie Brinkley" written across it. The Hat 'n' Boots have undergone a few changes since they were shown in the movie. These important pieces of our national history were originally constructed in 1954 as giant advertisements at a western-themed gas station. Everyone knows that gas stations must have themes in order to be successful, and I think a western motiff is very appropriate. I'd much prefer giant boots and hats over the more standard service station focus on bacteria and stench. Surprisingly the giant orange hat and glamour boots didn't rustle up sufficient clientele to keep the joint in business, so the station was closed and scheduled for demolition. That's when the City of Seattle came riding over horizon like true fronteir heroes and rescued the legends, moving them down the street to Oxbow Park where they stand today.
I'm not sure why the orange construction barrel and netting were installed underneath the hat. I can only assume that the ne'er-do-well teenagers that live in the area had been messing about below and on the hat, and this netting was a sure fire way to keep them out. Or perhaps the city had to make the under-hat less appealing to the local transients seeking shelter from the rain. And what a glorious shelter that would be! I'm very glad they kept the construction eyesores the exact same color as the giant western eyesores.
Aside from being raised in the semi-rural west, I'm not a person of cowboy heritage, so I'm not sure if wearing such colorful cowboy boots would result in a colorful cowboy pummeling. I'd really like to get a pair...which is exactly what the local bullies would probably tell me to do if I actually wore this style of boot. Beware to all that may visit us up here in Seattle, the "Hat 'n' Boots" have now been added to the required itinerary.

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